The first bit of advice given to me when I started out DJing? Simple. Forget the expensive kit, just keep buying the vinyl. And be real nice – especially to the warm-up DJ. Always be nice to the warm-up DJ. Of course, over the past three decades I’ve never hit the heady heights of being anything other than the warm-up DJ but in all my time opening up for the headliner I’ve always appreciated the decent ones who are nice to me. Horse Meat Disco are definitely one of the decent ones. Four of the decent ones in fact. Always a joy to play alongside, always a joy to party with. And no matter how worldwide and (in)famous they become, they always abide by the golden DJ rule. Always be dressed by Aldi. I mean always nice to the warm-up DJ. Warm, wonderful and ready to wow the crowd with their divine disco, hedonist house anthems, queer bangers, kooky electro and Hi-NRG vibes, they are the party headliners Queenie and I are always pleased to find in our middle aisle. Which is just what you need at Xmas. See you at the front. I’ll be the DJ overheating in my Aldi Xmas jumper.

Horse Meat Disco Xmas Party w/ Wildblood and Queenie Saturday 23rd December Patterns, Brighton 1pm-4am Tickets